Flying Without A Net

"Faith is the sunstance of things hoped for, the evidence of things unseen." That Bible verse has kept me afloat many days. It could also be the theme of my Sensual Sounds book tour to the Philadelphia/ New York area a few weeks ago. If you read my last blog, I traveled on the prayers of those warriors who reminded me that being an author isn't all about the money. They were right. I borrowed my way to the East coast. It didn't do much for my self-esteem to ask for money to make this trip. The stress of figuring out how to pay everyone back is something I'm wrestling with as I write this. But the riches I received are immeasurable. I felt blessed when my friends and me joyously greeted one another. It was so much fun to surprise my friend Patrick when Amy and me traveled to Native Restaurant in Harlem to support him as the host of Kariokee Night. Antonio, a friend I hadn't seen since childhood, made me feel safe the minute he hugged me. I felt so welcomed in his home during the time we spent together. My greatest pleasure, however, was sharing Sensual Sounds with those who stopped by my table at Horizon Books. My goal was to sell all the books I had in my bag which would've helped me pay off those loans. God had other plans. I sold only one book. But the intimate connection I felt in reading my words to strangers literally stood next to hear me read my poems is the reason why I can't waste my gift. I choked with emotion when an elderly Jewish man, who was moved to tears by one of my poems, told me stories of how helpless he felt when witnessing the indignities his African-American friends endured in during segregation. I also received much encouragement from those who couldn't afford to buy a book that day. Yes, I came home with less money than planned. But money doesn't buy everything. The intangible gifts I received from this trip has given me the strength to keep me walking in faith, not sight.